You mean you’ve NEVER heard the story of the….
…HASH SLINGING SLASHER?
The sash bringing
The trash singing
The flash springing
The crash dinging
….Yes. The Hash Slinging Slasher.
Can I have a dog please?
Ugh I should have done a dog shaming pic when Skout jumped out of the car on the freeway…
Omg the shower curtain dog looks so disappointed.
ok, new theory. maybe we should play so quietly, no one can hear us
well maybe we would sound so bad if some people didn’t try to play with big meaty claws
what did you say, punk?
WELL THESE CLAWS AIN’T JUST FOR ATTRACTING MATES
BRING IT ON OLD MAN, BRING IT ON
no people let’s be smart and bring it OFF
OH SO NOW THE TALKING CHEESE IS GONNA PREACH TO US
Pet your turtles, they enjoy snugglies more than painI feel like this is especially appropriate for cars and turtles in the road.
And don’t drill holes in them or paint em. Its painful and toxic and you’ll make the poor things cry!
Our turtles love having their heads and chins scratched. And a light pat on their shells. No hits, or thumps. They love good pets, please pet them with love.
Shells are LITERALLY their backbone, imagine if someone thumped you hard on the spine. It would suck right? Don’t do it.
Also their shells are covered in a VERY thin layer of fingernail-like material called scutes. When you paint it, a) it’s very easy for the toxins in the paint to absorb into the turtle’s system and poison them, b) it cuts off circulation to the thin layer of living skin below the scutes, c) it deforms the shell because turtles, especially young turtles, grow rapidly and the paint will inhibit proper shell growth and d) prevents the turtle from absorbing necessary vitamin D from UV rays (you know, that stuff they need to live). NEVER EVER PAINT A TURTLE EVER.
people paint turtles? what the fuck.
^^^ I had no idea painting turtles was an issue that needed to be covered… But I am glad it was! Turtles are super rad!
Why would you ever drill holes in a turtle’s shell? It’s their house…
"i can’t figure out this problem"
teacher: use your head
ah yes. my gender is blue with pink leg
so this is killing me cause my mind immediately thought.
and this is why im not allowed to be part of actual serious discussions.
i DONT UNDERSTAND THIS AT ALL I KEEP IMAGINING
I feel particularly close to this one:
THIS POST GET’S MORE FUCKIN HILARIOUS EVERY TIME I SEE IT!
I made a thing aswell.